Manifesting

On our wall in our kitchen is a handmade and colored map. 2 feet by 3 feet, it is a map of our dream. There is a space for my daughter's music studio, a barn for my son's horses and cats, a writing studio for my husband and my son, a walled in garden to grow vegs, a large orchard, two tree houses, a creativity studio for myself, a small cozy house to sleep, a fire circle in the center of a large circle of trees, a babbling brook, lots of trees, a yurt snuggled in a hidden place, and a large outdoor labyrinth.

It is my dream to have an outdoor labyrinth this close to me. I could walk it everyday. I would share it with others. I would tend to it, nurturing its path. I would grow sweet smelling herbs to mark its way.

I often times live under the directive of 'waiting until'....waiting until I have the time, the money, the space. But recently I have not wanted to wait. I want that labyrinth now! I want to walk it, share it, tend it, help it grow.

Since I don't have the land yet, and instead of heading down the path of feeling sorry for myself or wishing I had more money, I have tried to look at what I do have.

To start, I have it on my kitchen wall. I see it everyday. I watch my youngest trace its path with his tiny fingers. This dream is part of the collective consciousness in this house. We mention it here and there. Usually the comments are "have we forgotten anything," or "when do you think we will have enough money?" or "how long will we wait," "I like that spot best," or "I really want to play in that Mommy." I have this questioning and I like it.

I realize that what I am doing is tending a path, a way of life, a spiritual journey, a dream. Sure, it is not the labyrinth made of stones and grass and herbs, but it is like it. I realize that I am helping to foster an internal labyrinth in myself and in my children. For them to see that we have internal maps, times when we spiral inward and then outward. We have questions about life and we have moments of clarity. And we have dreams that are worth tending.

I recently took out my small hand labyrinth. It has taken me a year or so to want to walk it with my finger instead of my feet. I prefer my feet, but I am learning to settle for my finger. Two nights now I have walked it. And for two nights now I feel this stirring in me that my dream is manifesting. Instead on being on the wall, I now hold the labyrinth in my hands. I can take it with me or leave it on my table. I can walk it each day. I can share it with others (my children want to know more and more about it). I can tend to it (and really I am tending to my own spirit as I hold it). But mostly, I can experience it as part of my everyday life. I hold a bit of my dream in my hands and it feels so right.