Raising Children, Raising Adults: Risky Rhythm

For the first time I experienced a drumming circle yesterday. That one hour
rekindled something powerful in me. And here is what it taught me about risky rhythm:

1. Part of the whole. It is great to hear and feel your own beat and rhythm, but thrilling to hear how your rhythm is a part of a greater beat. Being whole means balancing the individual with communal. More often I would rather flee to my own thoughts and beat, but to be held in a circle of rhythms is life-giving.

2. See and hear the other. When we make music with others, it is good to look at them, make eye contact, a nod, a gesture, to recognize their presence and to signal your own. All part of finding your way, not getting too lost in your own reality, admitting the significance and need of the other.

3. Not too loudly, not too softly. Find a balance between listening to the music next to you and hearing the music within. Playing too loudly overbeats my neighbor's music. Playing in unison requires a keen ear to listen to others and at the same time, hear my own music. How often I want to shout (or play really hard) so that I can be heard. The drumming circle is about finding the right pressure on the drum so as not to overcome or underhear the music all around.

4. Thinking vs feeling. When I started thinking about what I was doing as opposed to listening and feeling the rhythm, I got lost. Made me wonder how much my thinking really trips me up.

5. There is power in circles. This drumming circle made me feel like I was a child again. I was all smiley and thrilled and happy. Why don't we sit in circles as adults? Having a young boy sit next to me during this drumming circle, having to look at him to communicate music to each other, having him initiate conversation with me afterwards, made me wonder how much I have forgotten to play, really play, really explore, and really take risks.